Rememberance
by Esmino Brown
Summary: A power struggle gone too far leads many Genoans to trace back their steps, and force Cane and Lily to start fresh
1. Prologue Part I

Prologue –

Part I

For the umpteenth time Cane Ashby flickers his wrist-watch up to meet his anxious stare. _4:30_ he muses, _thirty more minutes_. When the sun began to settle and spread into a golden scarlet glory, calming the wind he reassumed the rhythmic tapping in his shoe as he grinned a familiar toothy grin that hadn't seemed to quit to Devon, who uncharacteristically mirrored the same. He shoved his hands eagerly into his suit pockets and waits. Waits like he had for the past week, month, year and possibly for the better half of his life; nevertheless he waits, impatiently so. Today especially, it never ceased to astound him on how something that was so close could seem so far away. Even just standing here at the foot of the isle created simply by white silk and deep purple African violets mixed with rich yellow honeysuckles, matched with white chairs filled with the smiling expectant faces in the midst of a green May backyard, which would soon become a wedding, wasn't enough.

Today he wanted more. Everything to be exact and today having everything meant the woman at the other end of the isle, draped in ivory, covered in love and eternal promise.

At the thought of it his grin widens; heart opens and he feels full with a sentiment that he cannot define.

Whatever it was, he took it willingly; grabbed onto it and let it consume all areas of his anxious form, from the firmness of the soles of his feet firmly planted on the grass, all the way to his nerve wrecked hands clenching and unclenching fits behind his back and then casually into his tuxedo pockets.

The days leading to this moment, he had spent as a fanciful fool, singing and humming as he stalked the anticipated hallways, gliding and swaying his mother, Ester and Katherine in tow. He moved to the music inside of his spirit and he was playing the chords of a man in love. This blew the better half of his mind. If anyone would have told him he would think this way about love, marriage much less a woman he wouldn't hesitate to mention how bollux the whole idea was. But things have clearly changed, what Cane Ashby would have sooner deemed as the actions of a man who was clearly certifiable was now being replaced with the wisdom of a man that was consumed by something more meaningful; humbling even. It was lasting and imprinted into his very being.

For years there had always been a voice inside of him that spoke volumes as a lone boy and built up barriers as a man. A cruel constant reminder that told him that his circumstance was to never love or be loved. The same spiteful voice could have continued a tortured life and nurtured the kind of person that cared nothing for anything or anyone because no one truly cared for them. But he'd always known something was missing.

As much as he had tried to hide behind a great lust for life and nonchalance for consequence there had always been something _missing_. A hole that left him wide awake at night and consumed his thoughts from day to day.

She was that missing piece. The part that in which he found made him feel whole.

At the other end of the aisle Lilly Winters waited inside unconsciously fidgeting with her dress and looking into the mirror facing the archway to the back yard full of wedding guests in hastened intervals. Nerves unravelling at the thought of it all, three weeks ago the wedding fared as a beautiful thought. A dream that she could hitch up high to the universe and never reach; As the weeks passed and the million dollar decisions were made she had realized that getting married to the man she wanted wasn't as farfetched an idea as she'd originally thought when the idea shamefully popped into her head years back on her first initial school-girl crush. Now her mind only raced to how many ways anything could have gone wrong with this day, not to mention the creeping suspicion that today was simply just another figment of her feverish dreams. Which she hoped like heaven it wasn't.

Slowly, yet surely breaking her thoughts, Lily's head snapped up passed the patio door of their home to notice that Colleen, Anna and Cordelia had already placed themselves ahead of her in line waiting for a cue as she waited with her father watching her every move.

"Stop that already!" Neil chastised as his daughter dropped her hands to her side turning smiling weakly. In the past second Lily had teased, pulled and primped every inch of what to him seemed like perfection. She grimaced in the mirror, turned and repeated each action in the past hour.

"I'm nervous"

"I could have never guessed"

"You ready?" He studies her closely, smiles at the puddle of nerves that she's become in the last few hours and finally offers "Because if you have any second thoughts my car is outside full of gas and I could take you anywhere you wanna go," When her eyes narrow a sharp answer he laughs heartily and she follows suit. "Canada even, baby, all you gotta' do is say the word."

"Dad!" she grasps his shoulders and his breath catches. Lily is no longer the little girl he once knew; she was a woman of choice and principle. One of respect and wisdom, a woman that needed less of his protection and more of his understanding. "There is no turning back for me. Not this time, not ever" She peaked at the other end of the isle and smiled wide and full, at the hazed image "this is it – he, is it." Period no question or doubt. Looking in Cane's direction, even if she couldn't see him, soothes her and this makes Neil somewhat at ease.

He draws out his response, as he continues to stare in his daughter's hopeful eyes full of a conversation that she had given up on years ago. He knew what she wanted, more than anything Lily had wanted Neil to see who was to be her new husband as the man she'd always seen, and clearly as the father he was Neil could only see the possible danger hidden intricately behind a feverish love; the one that was often hidden to young girls like his daughter out of sheer admiration and clear as day to the perception of fatherhood.

Nevertheless hesitating at every step "He is" which was as much as an admission to him as it was to Lily "it. He is it, I mean"

He hoped the shortness of his words would translate to her that, despite his previous thoughts, Cane Ashby is a good man, and that he is more than deserving of her love and when Lily smiled and squeezed him into her arms, he'd known that it did. She let go for a moment and looked back up at him with hopeful eyes.

"Do you think she would have liked him?"

The question is met up into the sky where her eyes rise, away from her father and closer to where Lily thinks that she feels the closest to her mother, when she feels like that's not enough she drops her eyes to the mother's wedding dress and smoothes it out once more as if Drucilla herself were holding her close.

"Not at first," she scoffs at the honesty, smiles when he father reaches out once more to grasp the softness of her chin so that their eyes met "but when she would have seen how happy he makes you, and how much he loves you, she would have loved him."

"I miss her,"

"I miss her too baby"

When both father and daughter let their eyes fall back to reality. Neil's eyes look down at his daughter one last time. The small confirmation of somewhat of a mother's blessing was enough for her, she smiled and fidgeted with her dress and hair before looking up.

"Daddy I'm ready"


	2. Prologue Part II

Part II

_When the rain is falling in your face_

_And the whole world is on your case_

_I could offer you a warm embrace_

_To make you feel my love_

A little bit past five, when Lily's foot met the ivory walkway. There was a sound that swelled and filled the air. The noise became clearer as she stepped out of the gliding doors. There was a singer off to her far left of the backyard playing the piano and she was accompanied by a class of violins players creating a symphony that made her eyes water as she looked around.

The space that it filled took her breath away, this was really happening. It wasn't a dream anymore, and the very thought alone was replaced by something luxurious and rich fare. Everything that she'd assumed that she would never have or even deserve to have.

She clutched to her father as she nears closer, shyly smiled as the crowd rose to her presence and stills when she lifted her eyes to his. The certainty that she met in them tells her that she warrants everything that she sees and much more.

There's a calm in him that settles each and every nerve in her and stills their stare and spreads and cracks an anxious smile across her painted lips and resumes a walk that her wedding dress was worthy of; a sure walk one that said she was a grown, soon-to-be-married, and extremely loved by an amazing man. One man that took all of this in, and grinned like he could jump outside of his skin as she met him at the other end of the isle. When they did, Neil placed his daughter's hand in Cane's. He passed the young man a glare that says he would make his life painfully miserable if he dared to go against a single vow. He patted the threat pleasantly onto Cane's clasped hand, as he kissed Lily's temple and takes his seat along with the rest of the wedding party.

Reverend Simmons offered a smile that spreads across the crowd before gracing the couple. She says a prayer before saying her dearly beloveds and ends by offering them both a chance to their testimony's. Cane was the first.

"Lily, when I first met you I had no idea that you would change my life," he laughed before squeezing her hands, who was he kidding. "I had no idea that I would even let you, but I did ... and you, you changed my entire life. There I was, not wanting anything to do with anything or anyone, and you just showed up," he smiled as his knuckles grazed her chin "you opened up yourself to me and gave me a little bit of your heart every step of the way when I couldn't even do that for myself. I admired that; Lily, you've taught me that being brave is so much more about what you can give than the things that you can take. You make me want to be a better man and I am so grateful that I have you in my life – and will continue to have you in it. I love you, and you're not just the love of my life, which means I carry you in my heart. You are my everything which means I carry you in my spirit. I can't predict the future; I don't know what's ahead of us but I can tell you I'm gonna screw up and big sometimes," the crowd shared a laugh, "what I mean is, I can't promise you that every day is going to be a good day for us but ... you can rest assured that I will love you each step of the way and we'll see it through."

"Cane," her voice wavers. A tear falls, the first of many, and she rolls her eyes. Only she could blubber like a baby at her own wedding before she even said anything remotely emotional. "I can't even begin to describe in words how much loving you and knowing you has done for me. You know, it's really funny how you say that I changed your life, but you've really changed _mine _and you don't even realize it. When I first met you I honestly thought you were a scrub, I kind of had no interest of even getting to know you or even talk to you but then one day ... I was having the worst time, just gotten through with a divorce and my mom had just passed away and I bumped into you and you completely changed my mind about you. I was at this standstill where I thought no one would ever be able to understand me and you did." What was once a light snickering of the crowd traced by their smiles was replaced by a calm, a silence that settled over a scene of rarities between two people. All of this of course went unnoticed to Cane and Lily who for that moment nothing mattered except for their hands fitting tightly together and their eyes and souls set on a vow. "I opened up my heart to you because you made it easy for me to be able to; I was brave enough to give myself to you because _you _made me believe that I could be. Cane with you I've learned so much, grown so much, experienced so much ... and I owe you everything for being a part of my life," she'd memorized more but as her voice hitched and more tears fell her full heart tells her that this was more than enough. With a brush to the corner of her eyes, she managed the finish with, "and as your wife, lover and friend I will spend the rest of my days trying to give to you everything that you've given me and so much more"

_When the evening shadows and the stars appear _

_And there is no one there to dry your tears _

_I could hold you for a million years_

_To make you feel my love_

Closer than when they had began, at the small hitch in her voice Cane placed both of his hands at the side of her face and rubbed the way the slight beginnings of a flood of tears. Trying to hide behind joy he smiled away the shine that was growing in his eyes and the tingle that stung his throat and when the blur in Lily's eyes began to clear he kissed her lips strong.

"Hey, hey, hey!" Reverend Simmons playfully chastised, as the crowd shares a light laugh and the couple separates "We're not at that part yet,"

Just watching, there was a palpable emotion that sweeps over the crowd of their small wedding party. So strong it touches those who refuse to be touched and breaks through their forced barrier. At the sight of Jill's gushing tears of pride and joy, without allowing her eyes to move from the sight Kay gingerly places her hand over the hand of the daughter she knew, pats it lightly and waits and because she had always wanted it there. For today, Jill didn't cease to move it, or even see the act as offense she simply placed her own hand over her lost mother and squeezes for dear life.

Not even Billy could roll a disdainful eye at his Dudley- Do –Right half brother. The fact of it didn't elude the main point that he hated the guy, but deciding to be sensible, he concluded that in the grand scheme of things Cane deserved to have an ounce of happiness, and even more he realized that he deserved to have that with Lily; it was just too bad that he couldn't get a quarter of that happiness in his own miserable life.

Devon simply smiled, a slowly transformed pull of his lip, which was less of a curt response to not being able to understand whatever was going on between them and finally being able to understand what they truly meant.

Mac stilled herself at the arch of everything leaning, trying to be unseen. She had debated even showing up at the wedding considering the fact that she barely knew who Cane Ashby was, apart from being her displaced relative; and obviously the fact that she couldn't stand having four sets of eyes belonging to Billy and the new Chloe Abbott burning holes into her back. Nevertheless, something compelled her to jump into her hybrid until she found herself like an outsider looking into the most intimate of May weddings. She didn't know Cane or Lily very well but she was touched, and as a tear of her own trailed down the sides of her face, unknown to anyone, she realized why.

_I'd go hungry, I'd go black and blue_

_I'd go crawling down the avenue,_

_No there's nothing that I wouldn't do_

_To make you feel my love_

The reverend smiles and continued " at this time the couple has written their own vows for each other,"

"I join you in marriage, Cane, to make you my husband for the rest of my days. I will listen when you speak. I will care for you when you're sick. I will comfort you when you cry, and I will join your laughter with my own. I will always trust and respect you and always look for the good in you and delight in the person that you are becoming. And whatever lies ahead for us, good our bad, I will be your soft place to fall. Your love will be my only love, and I will give myself to no other. So with joy and certainty and as a symbol of my promise, I give you this ring."

"I join you in marriage, lily, to make you my wife for the rest of my days. I will listen when you speak. I will take care of you if you ever get sick. I will comfort you when you cry. I will join your laughter with my laughter. I'll cherish and I will protect you. I'll always see the good in you, and I will delight in the person you are becoming. And whatever lays ahead, good or bad, I'll always be your soft place to fall. And your love, it will be my only love, and I'll give myself to no other. With joy and with certainty and as a symbol of this promise, I give you this ring."

Reverend Simmons looked from now husband to wife and smiled as she placed her hand upon theirs. "With all the power vested in me and the state of Genoa City Wisconsin, along with all of those who hold you both dear. I now pronounced you husband and wife," before ending the officiating, she gave a pointed stare to an impatient Cane "you may _now_ kiss your bride, again."

And at that point that was all that mattered. The small validation that would be the transition between something that was already there, to something that will forever be. In all the excitement of the first brush of his lips on hers, and his arms encircling her overjoyed form, Cane willed himself to close his eyes for just a moment to take it all in, the smells, sounds and the feeling of it. Laughter, freshly cut grass, the lilies, the first brush of his lips on hers and the encircling of their arms; All things that would silently reside in his fondest memories.

_I could make you happy, make your dreams come true_

_Nothing that wouldn't do, go to the ends of the earth for you_

_To make you feel my love..._


	3. Chapter 1

Chapter One –

After three years it amazed her how consistent they were to not agreeing on what to do with their backyard. To other couples this was simply a no brainer, they're would be a distinct compromise that leaned greatly on the wife's input since she would be the one spending the most time out there had it not been for her husband's game room, and the car port out front. Sadly, Lily seemed to have the exception in husbands as Cane wanted the backyard for his bidding .

"I don't get what the problem is" Lily huffed as she splashed her fingers into the soapy water, a pout fixed into her twenty-six year old married lips. She'd figured getting her way was just a twitch of the lip and the switch of the hip away in all situations, but in three years of marriage Cane Ashby had become wise to her ways. His rebuttal to her cute sass was a solid calm cool that spoke of a man that couldn't be moved; she hated that. Nevertheless, she kept on with her pursuit with a refreshed vengeance "all I want is a little piece of the land for a garden. Not a new car or jewellery ... a garden Cane."

"That's the problem sweetheart, a garden that I will have to possibly fund and most likely build and take care of, besides -

"It's going to be my garden!" Lily protested "of course I'm going to pay for whatever's in it, and if you don't want to help me then I'll just fix it myself"

He smiled softly rubbing a plate dry, secretly loving watching her buttons pushed "that's just what you want us both to believe." It wasn't as if he said or did things to purposely make his wife mad, but her tenacity to get her way and all of its lovely characteristics was impossibly endearing, and had he not been sure it would have angered her more, he would have grabbed her and kissed her lips clean of all the protest "Besides, I want that very plot of land to build my dirt bike path, and let's not forget my basketball court. Sorry babe, we can't always have what we want now can we? Imagine the type of world that would be"

Lily imagined in the beautiful world where husbands actually listened to their wives and obeyed their every whim. If she were to be thinking practically, on average Cane did all those things and at times much more but there was always that one thing that he refused to agree with her on, and one of those things just happened to be what they would do with an unattended plot of land outside. Thinking quick, and desperately wanting her way Lily swirled on her heal in a dish-soap splendour to fully face her unyielding husband.

"You know," she offered slowly "We could have both have what we want," Lily smiled silkily as she resumed their previous position. When they were dating Lily rarely remoted to flaunt suggestiveness his way to get her point across, she almost felt ashamed of it. She was a good girl, she thought in a young stupor. The older she got Lily Winters realized that they were very choice things that made a man like Cane Ashby happy, sex, good food, and the mere promise of sex. Usually that had been enough to win any difference of opinions, and that had nothing to do with being good or bad, that had more to do with using the gifts that her mother had given her for the greater good; which in this case had been getting her way. Three years had passed and he'd learn to guard his simple nature by working at herweaknesses as well. When she swayed, he squeezed her hip bone deep into to his.

"Yes we can," he'd whispered into the dip of her earlobe, feeling her buckle and shiver at the sound of his husked drawl "but not on this, I'm sorry sweetheart" he twanged a little more than in his first apologies .

"oh, you are incredible you know that!? " she said each word one apart from each other, a detail he adored of her when she was upset "We've been arguing about the same spot of and for three whole years Cane. You know what you're problem is? You know nothing about compromise," Which was technically a lie, Cane knew a lot of what made a marriage functional and on other occasions outside of this one he knew perfectly well that a relationship bonded by promise was a game of give and take between the things that he wanted versus the things that they needed. He just would not bend on this.

Knowing that she knew that he knew a whole lot about compromise than she let on in her fit, Cane did what he did best when they had an argument whether big or small. He figured in this thing called marriage whenever one partner teetered on the bridge of irrational the other should counter which a light mocking humour. At this point, neither of them had that perfect benchmark for what a good marriage should look like, they like any other rational couple, had decided to play it by ear. Figuring if they ended up on the same end of the battlefield at least half the time, they'd end up doing better than half of the couples that they knew. Not sweating the small stuff is what kept them afloat.

"You know, when you're mad you crinkle up your nose in the most divine way," his lips brushed soft on the aforementioned area quicker than she had been able to swat him away "oh, and then there's your eyebrows, the way they curl" she feigned a glare, and he called her bluff beaming inside "and that frown," Cane swooned over the marble counter top before placing his head whimsically on his fists "it does something to me every time." He sighed and laughed as he dodged the rubber spatula that Lily flung his way.

"Shut up!" she shrilled, this time much more jokingly than angrily. Turning she squirmed defiantly as she felt him close behind her. Jumping startled when she heard his voice at her lobe once more.

With a voice that was low, shiver worthy and dripped with lustful promise he offered a "say it again," as if she'd just said something so endearing he'd make of himself a glutton to hear more "just slower this time"

Lily swung once again in a last effort to get him away so she could finish washing the dishes but turned too quick and ended up just where he had intended, cornered and backed up against the cold steel sink with him towering winningly above her.

Half defeated, more elated at their current position. "I am trying to wash these dishes man," she whispered quietly trying to avoid his strong stare as it draped to the top of head to the bottom of her chin

"and I am trying to show my love undying love for you woman,"

She raised an eyebrow and scoffed, "if you really loved me, you would give me my damn garden."

"Oh shush and kiss me" she did but purses her lips out of spite, and just as promptly received a dissatisfied "what the hell was that?" from her husband.

"A kiss." She affirmed promptly before turning around and turning the sink on "You said you wanted one, I gave you _said_ kiss. Now leave me alone I -" she teased and could almost feel it coming when Cane spun around to face him once again, twirled her towards the kitchen island before he finally hitched her up and kissed her back so expertly that all Lily could do was gasp and cling on to his wrists until the blissful ride was over leaving them both smiling and panting the way only seasoned lovers did.

As they slowly ascended from their haze, Cane passed a quick then second glance at his watch. "I've gotta get going soon,"

"Yeah you do, Mac's shift is almost over" Lily continued of her husband's hobby turned profession at Jimmy's. "You wait any longer she's going to have to carry Billy on her back to get him home in one piece"

"That's not my problem. Billy decides to drink himself stupid almost every night on his own." Cane snarled back, then eased when his eyes met hers once again searching for the humour and love to smooth the edges. As he came closer to her and smoothed his hands at the dip of her sides.

"Come with me," he offered to Lily as she placed the last dish in the cabinet, and leaned against the counter.

"What as your middle woman, just in case you and Billy start fighting again?"

"No. I was thinking more a along the lines of my assistant." He smiled proudly "I love it when you're there, and you can walk around with your adorable little green clip board and help me out." Cane found it cute. "Besides it's the middle of the week and the bar's barely busy, we could go to the backroom and cuddle until quitting time"

Lily laughed at that. In his language, cuddling had a lot less to do with comfort and a lot more to do with a lot less clothes. A fact that she wouldn't have minded had she not had work to do.

With a dash of connections and a fist full of hope Lily was able to take her designing firm off of the ground. Victor Newman had been her second highest bidding client of the year, the rebuilding of Sabrina's art gallery as a new memoriam of all of her art pieces had been her baby for months and she couldn't risk disappointing him. Even if he'd seen her in her diaper's way back when, and especially even if the prospect of 'cuddling' with her husband in the office of his bar, with the marvellous couch, brought up many delicious possibilities. "Tempting but no, I've really got to work on these blueprints."

He was drawing out a protested 'fine' when the phone began its bleating interruption. He was the closest to it, and with one stride shook the phone from its cradle before sighing and answering with an amused "Ashby residence,"

She watched him repeat the greeting, before his eyebrows pinched together and he placed the phone back on its hook.

"Who was it?"

"No answer" he said putting the phone back on its cradle and leaning against the kitchen island. "Whoever was on the other line hung up at the sound of my voice"

"That's weird."

"Yeah, it's probably a wrong number though," Cane said absently as he grabbed his jacket from the love seat and headed towards the door. "anyways, baby I gotta go to the bar. Mac is waiting on me to cover her shift."

"Ok" Lily said as she met him there, and got up on the tip of her toes to place her lips on his.

"See you tonight?" he said as they stood in front of the threshold, making her snicker at the glint in his eyes that spoke of unfinished business.

"You don't quit don't you?"

"Nope, not until I get what I want" Cane whispered between a series of kisses which started at her lips and ended at the base of her neck. "See you later,"

"Ok. I love you."

Despite everything, Cane & Lily's love and life had become a ritual that they could silence the rest of the world with and just be, which to them was how they chose to approach marriage. Something that they both had gotten into and chose it to be something that would be their saving grace from the uncharacteristically hectic pace of life that little town Wisconsin offered


	4. Chapter 2

Chapter Two

Being a bartender at Jimmy's Mackenzie Browning had encountered her fair share of drunks. The happy drunk, the angry drunk, the drunk that needed just a little bit of liquid confidence to make it through the night. However, the most fascinating of them all was the drunk that firmly believed that happiness was just at the other end of the glass. Ideally, she imagined that in some fashion all drunks happened to believe this, had they not she wouldn't have a job, but there was something intrinsically different about this drunk; they prayed behind it like a believer to eternal salvation and if that were the case in her eyes Billy seemed to be in deep prayer.

And as if on cue under her scrutiny "Hit me again!" came Billy's slurred intrusion in her observations as he sloshed a glass that was once full of tanqueray against the bar table.

"I think it's time to cut you off, you've had enough." Was her sharp reply, as she continued to examine him."What's the matter with you anyway?" There was something completely off about his demeanor tonight, it was no surprise that Billy was a lush on many extremes on just as many vices but there was something different that she couldn't put her finger on tonight. The image of Billy that had presented itself before her was the difference between a somewhat lust for life and the aftermath of pure defeat.

"First, I haven't had enough, not barely" he huffed the last statement under his breath as if not meaning for anyone to hear or even notice it. "Second, there's nothing wrong with me," he punctuated "and if there was it wouldn't be any of your business,"

"You shouldn't be so moody with your ride home," Mac sniped as she swiped his glass and put it behind the bar. As time passed in their conversation she was getting less interested in dissecting him and more interested in getting him out before Cane came in and all hell broke loose. "Speaking of which, for you my friend the bar is closed, my shift is up I'm taking you home."

To this Billy openly groaned as Mac continued. "Come on, you know you aren't even supposed to be here" she spoke evenly as she remembered the last time that the brothers were in the same room, needless to say, considering they hate each other, it didn't go well. Billy and Cane were suggested not to be in the same way of space since Billy, in a drunken stupor, goaded Cane on his stint with Lily clearly in the lewdest of terms and met Cane's fist on his jaw. The two nearly tore the bar to threads, so in haste she added "Cane's going to be here any minute, and if he sees you -

"Oh Fuck Cane, Mac," Billy growled officially spent. "He acts like he's the boss of this place."

"Well Billy, that's because he is. I'm driving you home now."

As if on cue, Cane strolled through the bar door and Mac sucked in a breath and hissed a silent curse. Her eyes diced between the brothers who had already been made painfully aware of each other's presence before sending a pleading glance to a tall burly man to her far right, Trevor. Knowingly he appeared from out of the corner where he was retrieving stray glasses and popped up in front of Cane's sight.

"Cane my man! Nice of you to pop up out of the love nest to join us" the man smiled as brightly as his baritone across the room as he bumped fists with Cane.

"Enjoy me while you can, I don't make a practice of leaving my nest for just anything" although he meant it jokingly, his speech was tight as his eyes pierced into the man at the other side of the room. Distractedly, he continued "How you doing, Trevor?"

"Not too bad, hey," Trevor drew closer causing Cane to tear his eyes away from Billy and look directly at his friend. His eyes were different from how they'd been a moment ago, the jovial expression he'd had was replaced with a solemn intensity. "These guys came in about an hour ago, I've never seem 'em around have you?" He asked nodding his head and giving Cane time to give a quick glance to the unfamiliar group of men. He thought nothing of it.

"No, why?"

"Keep your eyes open, that's all." He answered his stare sharp.

He didn't bother question, from the time Cane had met Trevor his gut had always been spot on, it was Trevor who encouraged him to get over himself and give into his feelings for Lily way back when, it was also Trevor who clued him in on Jimmy's when it was on the market just as Cane began to grow restless of working the family business, owning his lifetime friend a warranted place as partner as well as becoming the few people whose opinion greatly mattered.

"I will," Cane said slapping his friend on the back before retreating to the bar.

As he approached the bar his was a calm flame growing into a fire, he kept his rage below surface until it was needed unlike his brother's quick draw.

"Why are you here Billy," Cane said simply.

"What does it look like, brother?"

"I know what it looks like;" Cane snapped quietly walking passed his brother "I just want to know why the hell are you always in my bar when I'd asked you to leave permanently. Weeks ago," he finished facing him bracing his palms on the cool of the bar, he pressed them down to keep them from flying up and doing something irrational.

"You shouldn't be here Billy,"

"How un-businessman like of you Cane, you're willing to turn away a paying patron" his brother said while leaning and whispering to another customer "no wonder this place is going down the crapper"

"I'm not turning you away Bill, I'm sure you spent just enough to keep business afloat way before I stepped in," Cane swiftly replied, sparing a swift eye between Mac and Billy.

Cane knew what all of Billy's sophomoric outburst were about, this wasn't new. He made an act of parading around as the lost and hurt boy wanting the family to feel sorry for all he had been forced to sacrifice once he had come to town from Australia and been taken in by Jill and the rest of the Chancellors, and there was even a time that he felt sorry, but now his apologies had taken a different dimension.

He was sorry he didn't grow up with a silver spoon so shoved down his throat he could shit good fortune. He was also sorry that he grew up dirt poor without a dollar to his name, and his little brother Billy had the life and love that he lived for.

And now he was just tired of Billy's whining and didn't want to see or hear anything of him for as long as he could possibly stand, which as far as Cane was concerned could be a hell of a long time.

"Leave. Right now." His voice was simple, and sharp as he turned on his heel preparing to retreat. "When I come back I don't want to see your face in my bar."

"Why is it that you have to take everything from me? Huh Cane. First, it was my mother and Kay ... my rightful place in the family business, then my friendship with Lily, Jimmy's" Billy spoke to his brother's back getting the intended action when he saw him hault, and turn to face him. "Hell, you're even taking Mac away from me, what's next fucking Christmas?" he swivelled in his seat, his shaky voice raising decibels as he went further into his speech "Now look, you tried to take Deliah from me and now my marriage to Chloe is over and she's gone anyway,"

Not that Billy loved or liked Chloe in the first place, he knew their marriage was a mistake from the minute he'd proposed it, but he followed through hoping he'd be able to tough it out for Deliah's sake. As the years went by his marriage to Chloe got progressively worse ... and the only real person that suffered through the whole ordeal was Cordeliah, he watched the pained look in her eyes as his and Chloe's fights got worse and worse and he did nothing to stop it. He watched as her tiny footsteps trailed his out the door in a drunken stupor without a look back, and today he stood idly by as Chloe packed her and Delilah's things and left on the early morning flight for New York indefinitely. If that didn't spark a cause for getting piss drunk, he sure as hell didn't know what could.

"If you think I took all those things from you, Billy you're more stupid than I thought." Clearly seeing hearing this from his ex-con of an adopted brother, no less, who could now clearly do no wrong in anyone's eyes wasn't helping his case. In fact it was beyond infuriating coming from the man who continued to take everything from him.

"You know what's stupid Cane? After all of these years you still think you have a place in this family. You don't belong, you never will. You're just feeding Jill's guilt about her poor mothering skills, until the next thing comes along. Who knows, if Chance ever decides to come back, you're gonna be just like a passing thought," drawing closer he whispered "I can tell you how that feels, it's a shitty existence."

And there it was the sentiment that always hangs in the air of all their arguments. He wasn't one of them. Not a part of the unit, not a part of anything really. The words repeat themselves as he remains silent, soaking the truth of the matter in. The words are daggers that hit his soul but couldn't scratch his demeanour as he looks at Billy as strong as he had moments before. Turning away for a second time Cane reaches for the phone, not a word or a glance passed towards his sibling in his path.

Mac had watched the exchange between the brothers on the sidelines along with Trevor, as soon as she saw Cane retreat and the sour expression marred across Billy's face she could only guess the words that were exchanged between the two and as she imagined they couldn't have been pleasant. She figured she owed it to herself to check up on him considering she had been the one that had been sneaking Billy into the bar for weeks, when she knew that this may be the end result.

She waited about thirty minutes, instructing Trevor to babysit Billy as she looked for her boss. When she found Cane's door she pressed her hand on it before completely pushing it open, and was surprised to see him not angered, stoic, or shattered by his brother's words but normal. His usual self, his legs cocked up against his desk, one arm scratching the back of his head leisurely and his phone pressed into his ear as cunning leer spread across his features as he smoothly whispered "so what are you wearing right now ?"

"Oh my god!" Mackenzie shrilled as she closed her eyes and shut her ears as she slid away from the office. "I'm sorry!" she called out, passes away in the hallway "Sorry!" of Cane's interrupted conversation with Lily " I just came to bring you the extra shipments before I headed out." She weakly added as she dangled the papers in front of his door, a few more apologizes coming after that.

He laughed at that and she sighed slight relief. "You can come in Mac, I'm decent. I'm off the phone,"

They were barely blood but hearing Cane talk to his wife was nearly as bad as catching the older brother -that she'd never had - in a highly compromising position. Not that it was a rare thing to hear, let alone see but every time she felt like she were an intruder watching the unguarded moments.

With a weak smile Mac returned to the office, "it sounds like I was about to walk in on quite the show,"

"That you were my friend" Cane said easily as he accepted the shipment documents, before looking at her thoughtfully. "Sorry"

"No need! who am I to stand in the middle of young love," Mac smiled in silent awe of them before she side-stepped "we need some more V.S.O.P your little brother keeps sucking it down like it's HI-C."

To this Cane scoffed dryly barely looking up at her as he looked over shipments "Tell me something I don't know,"

She sighed and leveled herself before staring at Cane. In the few years that they had been working together, she still couldn't say that she knew him expertly well, but they lived the same type of childhood, she knew exactly what was going on behind the jovial exterior. No matter how wanted he may have felt now, there was still a part of him that still felt like an orphan. Its hard to feel like you belong when you have spend all of your life alone, believing that you would always be alone. That was the vile thing about belonging, when you spend long enough not belonging to anyone it becomes hard to shake the feeling that you ever will.

"look, Cane – I'm sorry about what Billy –

"Don't worry about it , Mac I'm fine. It takes more than Billy to bring me down," he smiled shrugging it off.

"Either way I hope you know you are a part of this family. No matter what Billy or anyone else thinks. You know as well as I do that our family isn't based on blood"

That he knew, but yet it was harder to believe. Nevertheless he offered Mac a grateful smile as the words were becoming too hard, and continued with something that avoided the topic all together "It's late Mac, you should go home."

She smiled, knowing she got through somewhat, nodded and backed away "Goodnight, Cane."


End file.
